Gambling Queen

Have I ever told you that I love gambling?

Sad, but true.

I have so many good memories of gambling experiences.  Most of them involve a trip with my husband or girlfriends, and they are probably funny memories because I never let myself lose too much money.  That’s the key.  NEVER EVER EVER go to the ATM machine in a casino after 2am.  That is a very important foundational rule of the smart gambler.

Like lots of other people, I get very excited about gambling.  The adrenaline starts pumping and it’s like THE SKY’S THE LIMIT.

I will play pretty much anything where there is an opportunity to win money.  Craps, blackjack, roulette, Bunco, poker with friends, and the game that you can play in the diners at the casinos where you pick numbers.  What the hell is the name of that game??  I haven’t had enough coffee yet this morning.  And can we mention Bingo?  BINGO ROCKS.

Bingo is not just for old ladies, people.  There is even a website where you can play bingo in the comfort of your own home, meaning you don’t have to sit next to the man in the wheelchair who chain smokes.  It even has a kick-ass name.  It’s called Cheekybingo – I think the outfit is run out of the UK, because Americans sure as hell don’t use the word “cheeky” very often.  Except Piper.  She is the American who uses it in her tagline.

I have very fond memories of bingo.  I played it with my dad in Tulsa at the Oaks Country Club on a regular basis, and on one trip to Nevada I played lots of hours of bingo with my friend Gina.  It was on a trip a few years back when we went down to Mesquite, Nevada, with Gina and her husband Rich.  Lots of people in Salt Lake City will totally bag on Mesquite, but I love it.  It is a town right across the border from Utah and specializes in truckers, strange-looking cocktail waitresses, and cheap gamblers like me.  You can get rooms at one of the five casinos for like forty bucks, and they are not gross.  I’m serious.  I’ve written about gross hotel rooms, so you know I have standards.

After we lost a bunch of twenties on the blackjack table, Gina and I noticed the sign for the Bingo room and we wandered in.  OHMYGOD they had Bingo games going night and day!!  And it was cheap!!  We had so much fun.  We each bought two cards and some nice old lady gave each of us a Bingo stamper and we went to town stamping out numbers on those sheets.  My memory is hazy, but I think I remember Gina winning some money.  Maybe not.  But it was CHEAP FUN.  And free drinks!  We sort of looked like this lady…

 Without the cigarette, I guess.

A website like Cheekybingo could be a little dangerous for me.  I would not want to become that mother who stares at the computer for five consecutive hours, waving away her children when they come to her complaining of hunger.  So I would have to set a little timer next to me while I played, and when it dings, IT DINGS.  Time is up!  I’m totally playing Bingo online the first chance I get, because it doesn’t matter that after five years I finally threw away my bingo stamper just two days ago.

Won’t be needing that thing for all my online winnings!!