Sloan turned 10 months old last week. I have to say that the older this baby gets and the more her personality starts to rear its head shine, the more I think she will be giving me a run for my money. But oh, how I love this baby!
I have realized with her, my second, that I am appreciating this time of infancy. With Beatty, I was too freaked out. I mean, serious identity crisis. I hardly remember taking the time to just sit and watch him play or explore. It is so fun to watch her bypass all the toys and instead find the strangest thing in the room to amuse herself with. Like a vase on the floor or a discarded toothbrush. I think that it would probably be even better watching a baby play after you’ve had a big fat joint. But I suppose that would lead me to the kitchen in search of some Doritos, and maybe some sour cream to dip them in, and then I would forget all about the baby and I guess all sorts of shit would go down at that point. I don’t know if it’s the fact that she’s a second child or that she’s a Scorpio, but Sloan knows exactly what she wants. And she will grab and scratch to get it. Or scream loudly to make you understand.
Man, can she scream.
Don’t get me wrong, this baby goo-goos and ga-gas and smiles at everyone and just wins them over…and is generally very pleasant. But if she wants that drink with the straw, she WANTS IT NOW and she wants to HOLD THE CUP HERSELF, DAMMIT. Whoa, sister. Didn’t mean to take away your independence! And don’t even think about giving her that baby food, she will have the chicken marsala, thank you very much!
I’m trying like crazy to get this baby to sleep through the night. In the back of my mind, all my problems will be solved when I can get a full night’s sleep. I will instantly lose ten pounds and my face will look five years younger. I will feel sexy and want to jump in the sack with my husband when he gives me that special look. I will not snap at my children and I will eat smaller portions and motherhood won’t seem so tedious and I will want to cook low-fat healthy meals every night for dinner.
Please don’t suggest any books, I’ve read them. I KNOW, I KNOW, I JUST HAVE TO LET HER CRY FOR AT LEAST THREE NIGHTS IN A ROW. But you don’t have to lay there and listen to Sloan. She screeches, she wails, she does it loudly, and she will persist for more over an hour. She’s not a quitter.
Oh my god, but that smile, and those rosy cheeks and bright eyes and those tiny little feet! Captivating!
Without getting all mystical and “family is forever” on you, I honestly feel that Sloan is the baby that was meant to come into our lives. It took a while to get her here and I learned a lot and barfed a lot along the way. I never thought I would have a little girl, and here she is. A little scary, but I’m sure she will teach me a lot. And return all the eye-rolls I have dished out.
She is willful, she is opinionated, she screeches and won’t sleep through the night.
But she’s all mine.